Keeping a clean house with kids is like taking your car to the carwash when you know it’s going to rain.

When I first stayed home with Libby, I thought I was going to have a perfectly sparkly house. For about the first nine months, I did. Then she became mobile. Everything changed. When she hit two, I learned that cleaning was about compromising.

A sink free from dishes means a living room scattered with toys. While I am occupied with cleaning, she’s occupied with “creative play” (a.k.a. messing).

Once I added a second baby to the mix, it was pretty much game over. With kids, it’s so hard to keep on top of things. It can feel like you are taking one step forward and two steps back.

After taking the last month to self-reflect and get more organized, there are a few things that can really help when you’re busy and feel like you just don’t know where to start.

Stage One

The first thing I did was acknowledge that it’s not the physical mess and clutter holding me back.

It’s the mental block that says I can’t have people over when my house looks like this. I’m so embarrassed my house looks like this. How come this house never seems clean?

Stage Two

Then stage two of thinking hits. When things seem so ridiculous, you know, ‘this needs to change.’ I can’t keep doing this. I am going nuts. :: Minor breakdown, maybe some tears. ::

And the vicious cycle goes round and round. To break the cycle and deal with an overwhelming mess, try these tips:

The first thing I did was take a pen and paper and write down everything that was bothering me, not just cleaning-wise, but everything.

I didn’t hold back. A lot of times the mess that happens around us becomes a habit.

Clutter in our mind becomes clutter in our home. You’re not going for a Pulitzer Prize here. This doesn’t have to be pretty; it doesn’t even have to be spelled right. You just have to get those thoughts from your head to the paper, so you can acknowledge them head-on.

Try starting with what’s bothering you day in and day out.

When I made my list, I came up with things that were constantly cluttering my mind. For instance:

Why am I always looking at my electric and gas bill? Just put that stuff on auto-pay.

Every month, I have to find those two bills to pay them on time. I don’t have them on auto-pay because I feel I need to check them every month.

Just as easily, I can go online to see if there is an abnormal spike in payment. If an error comes up, I can investigate then. This is an example of unnecessary mental clutter and PAPER CLUTTER. Which brings us to step 2…

2. Get that clutter out!

Do you find yourself constantly moving things around? What are these things? There’s a good chance, just like learned memory, you don’t even realize you are doing this. Find a place for these things. Come up with a system.

In my house, I created a “drop station.” I flipped my wine bar (which is a hazard with babies) around and used the top of it to set our keys, sunglasses, and wallets. Next to it, I placed a small rug to put our shoes.

Now, instead of moving my keys around the kitchen 100 times, I set them at the drop station. This is household operation management. We slowly fix “broken systems” that are driving us bonkers.

Rinse and repeat with all of the items on your list. Want to go through a list one by one? Check out my free printable 31 Things You Should Throw Away, Donate, or Reorganize.

Related Post: 31 Things You Should Throw Away, Donate, or Reorganize

>Where to start

Start with easy changes first. Things that only take a couple of minutes and have a big impact.

Don’t let thinking about the task become more daunting than the task itself. There are two tricks to help you get started:

1. The 5 Second Rule: Count back from 5, when you get to one, blast off. Get started.

Doing this interrupts your thought pattern that protects you from the stress cleaning gives. Check out the video below from Mel Robbins for more details:

2. Set a Timer

One trick that helps me when I really don’t want to do something is setting a timer.

It shows me how quickly I can actually accomplish a task. Going forward, I realized I shouldn’t be spending 40 minutes dreading the few minutes it takes to load or unload the dishwasher. Read more about that, 10 Genius Time-saving Kitchen Hacks for Busy Moms.

3. Clean out the stuff that is weighing you down

It’s amazing how our stuff can become all-consuming. Often we don’t realize how time-consuming it is to upkeep our stuff.

After having two kids, I have gotten to the point where I can’t take unnecessary items floating around. I think this is pretty common among families with children.

With the heavy emphasis on gifts and consumerism, it’s incredibly hard not to feel weighed down by the clutter, toys, and convenience items that take up every single inch of our space. Even getting fast food is an invitation for a toy.

The biggest part of releasing yourself from stuff is letting go of the guilt of parting with it.

It’s so easy to feel that we have to keep items to prove our appreciation. However, things are just things. Sometimes it’s nice to have a couple of sentimental items, but not everything is worth keeping.

4. Keep Less Stuff

The problem with stuff is that we don’t realize there is a problem with it. The things we own slowly take over our lives.

Not only do we have possessions, but we put expectations on ourselves to take care of them. If you acquire more possessions than you have the energy to take care of, then these possessions become a burden. A burden that clutters your mind and your home.

These items become things we are constantly rearranging and moving around the home.

Cleaning out clutter, for me, is not a quick one-day process. It’s an ongoing process. Parting with our possessions can be difficult. The hardest reason being, I feel I may one day need that item.

If I get rid of my things, I’m going to have to spend the money acquiring them again. In all reality, they’re not something that affects my daily life. If these things “just disappeared,” I probably wouldn’t even notice them gone (body sprays, clothes, certain pairs of shoes).

In my post, living your life like a Hallmark movie, it’s for entertainment and fun, but one thing I’ve observed is that we often let our fantasy selves purchase items and accumulate things for hobbies that don’t truly fulfill our inner desires.

Hallmark movies are so fulfilling because of their singularity. The characters have hobbies, just one or two; they’re not serial hobbyists. Their collections are small, they fit on a shelf. The items they collect add to the storyline; they do not overpower it.

It begs the question: how are your items and your collections adding to your storyline? Are they overpowering it? Is the stuff you own, owning you?

Related Post: Cleaning and Organizing the Master Closet

FAQs

What should I do first if I’m overwhelmed by cleaning?

Start by acknowledging your feelings of being overwhelmed and make a list of everything that bothers you about the mess. This will help you identify where to begin.

How can I deal with mental clutter before starting to clean?

Take a moment to write down your thoughts and feelings about the mess. Acknowledging and confronting these feelings can help reduce mental clutter and ease the cleaning process.

What are some easy cleaning tasks I can start with?

Begin with tasks that require only a few minutes, like putting away shoes or clearing off a small space. Small accomplishments can motivate you to tackle bigger tasks.

How can I maintain a clean home with kids around?

Create designated areas for items like shoes and keys to minimize clutter. Make cleaning a family activity by involving your kids, which can also teach them organizational skills.

What should I do with items I no longer use?

Consider donating, recycling, or discarding items that no longer serve a purpose in your life. Keeping less clutter will help maintain an organized home.